An old friend died around 4 years back and I only found out recently.
It feels so strange and I'm not sure how to react. The only thing I have to connect me to his memories are a bunch of letters, written over a period of 15 odd years. I don't even have pictures. He had the only photograph of the two of us together. We hadn't been in touch in the last few years, but now that I know I'll never hear from him again, it makes me feel like I'm afloat without a rudder.
The other day I found a letter that I'd written to him in 2002, and I had attached a photograph of my new life. I guess I forgot to post the letter and it also explains the long gap in our communication. It was my turn to reply... and he just didn't receive it. Which is just as well because he died thinking I was just busy with life. And he didn't have to find out about all the changes and diversions that took place.
My only regret is that he probably died thinking that I had forgotten him.
Te echo de menos, mi querido amigo.
It feels so strange and I'm not sure how to react. The only thing I have to connect me to his memories are a bunch of letters, written over a period of 15 odd years. I don't even have pictures. He had the only photograph of the two of us together. We hadn't been in touch in the last few years, but now that I know I'll never hear from him again, it makes me feel like I'm afloat without a rudder.
The other day I found a letter that I'd written to him in 2002, and I had attached a photograph of my new life. I guess I forgot to post the letter and it also explains the long gap in our communication. It was my turn to reply... and he just didn't receive it. Which is just as well because he died thinking I was just busy with life. And he didn't have to find out about all the changes and diversions that took place.
My only regret is that he probably died thinking that I had forgotten him.
Te echo de menos, mi querido amigo.
7 comments:
'My only regret is that he probably died thinking that I had forgotten him.'
Like you - like most of us - he probably assumed that sooner or later you wold be in touch.
So much we should do yet we can't...it's sometimes physically not possible.
'My only regret is that he probably died thinking that I had forgotten him.'.....as someone once said, repentant tears wash out the stain of guilt!
I went through all the letters yesterday. There must have been many more over the years, but I found around 27. It's made me quite restless and I'm trying to find out where he was buried. If nothing else now, I can at least put some flowers on his grave. It was a unique friendship - we were 47 years apart.
Sorry about your loss. I can sense the helplessness you feel right now. Never knew and most likely would never know who your friend was and how special a person was he but I am sure he is in his happy place now and he would know that you care.
My prayers for him and wishes with you.
Take care.
Himanshu, thank you for your kind words.
My dear CC,
Let bygones, be bygones.
Make a quick list of your "old" friends (like me & u? Over 20 years apart), who are still alive and with whom you have unique friendships.
And at least send them a post-card to say you remember them.
Peace and love,
- Joe.
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